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Two Dogs

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  A SILKEN-EARED Spaniel, who traced his descent from King Charles

  the Second of England, chanced to look into a mirror which was

  leaning against the wainscoting of a room on the ground floor of

  his mistress's house. Seeing his reflection, he supposed it to be

  another dog, outside, and said:

  "I can chew up any such milksoppy pup as that, and I will."

  So he ran out-of-doors and around to the side of the house where he

  fancied the enemy was. It so happened that at that moment a

  Bulldog sat there sunning his teeth. The Spaniel stopped short in

  dire1 consternation2, and, after regarding the Bulldog a moment from

  a safe distance, said:

  "I don't know whether you cultivate the arts of peace or your flag

  is flung to the battle and the breeze and your voice is for war.

  If you are a civilian3, the windows of this house flatter you worse

  than a newspaper, but if you're a soldier, they do you a grave

  injustice4."

  This speech being unintelligible5 to the Bulldog he only civilly

  smiled, which so terrified the Spaniel that he dropped dead in his

  tracks.

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